Seeds for a happy planet

Different than what I planned, but one week after we finished the fifth iteration of Women Moving the Edge I still find value in writing down the words that struck me, the new wise insights I got in the process.
The following words – pieces of sentences – should be read like a poem, with attention for the deeper meaning they carry. These are the words I noted down on Saturday morning (Jan 31), our first session after the welcome and check-in of the night before.

our emptiness
our silence
is not ‘absence of’
it is huge
it has meaning
it touches me
My whole solar plexus is expanding.
There is incredible strength
it can move mountains
it comes from within.

We make something to hold something else.

When I sense into the center, it feels as if we are pregnant.
What are the conditions that enable a fruitful pregnancy?
Being pregnant is about being. You can’t rush it.
Lying in bed was ‘doing something’.

Do I make sense when I am ‘useless’?
It is OK when it is related to others.

Being pregnant, my body knew exactly what to do! It taught me! It was making some magic. How subtle it is to let your body teach you!

We can be pregnant of so many things!

It was the process of what was to come.
The body knows.
Now – Here – This.

The emptiness has meaning.
The house and the walls are there to share with each other.

I am curious…
The way of our body…
My body wants to be touched.

The nothing is full of something.
I love to be in the silence with you.
I love when we slow down.
A golden silence.

When we slow down, we go down. And what becomes possible is joy!
“And she gave him her joy at what he had created.”

The feminine has been on a long journey. What is the feminine?

When Shekinah comes back the 23rd letter will appear.
The holding has value.
I named it and claimed it.
Shekinah is back.

The feminine is bonding together… weaving under and over… to create a beautiful piece.
Perchta, the Goddess of Weaving and Knitting…

If we can’t name it, how can they know? I can’t be pregnant without his seed.
“… she lived with him and gave Form to his creative Word”
We can’t blame them for not seeing it.
Men are happy to take care of women being pregnant.
Holding space for our own femininity.

You are pregnant or not; you can’t be a little bit pregnant! We can’t be a little bit feminine.

So positive.
So much potential.

Either you give us the stage, or we take it! Dancing, singing, joy, little stories, jokes…
We are in separate cars on the same road.
Nobody is to blame, not myself, not the men, nobody. Honoring instead of blaming.

IMAGINE   CREATE   INNOVATE

Our attempts for innovation are welcome!

What you find here below was written by Maria Scordialou, Sarah Whiteley and myself when we had five days of intense learning and living together in May ‘08 (Axladitsa Guardians Gathering). It gives a beautiful, and rich description of what is asked from us now.
Unless we engage our authentic selves, we cannot live the future now.
Unless we engage our fullness, we cannot take the leap individually and call in collectively.
Unless we tremble collectively, we cannot presence the new.
Unless we take a leap together, we cannot access and live the next level of our humanity.
Unless we are willing to hold the space open long enough for our collective clarity to emerge, we cannot shift our systems and behaviour for the better.
Unless we fuse the streams of practice and inquiry, we cannot see what else is possible and be prepared to meet our chaos.
Unless we acknowledge our collective identity, we cannot co-create our real work.
Unless we unlearn our complicatedness, we cannot find the simplicity of the next elegant step.
Unless we share our new insights immediately, we cannot not serve evolution.
Unless we live through our collective identity, we cannot become whole.
Unless we engage our authentic selves, we cannot live the future now.
Unless we engage our fullness, we cannot take the leap individually and call in collectively.
Unless we tremble collectively, we cannot presence the new.

Monday morning, our last half day together…

Some had meditated, I had been blogging… As usual, we gathered in circle after breakfast. Taking the talking stone… seemingly totally different voices were heard, which were brought to one picture as someone saw that they were all answers to the same question. Without naming it, we had arrived to the third piece of M’s map: the Thou, the practice. We need the Body, the Heart, the Mind and the Soul!!! We need the complete wisdom, held together by the inquiry.

It brought us to our next question:
What needs to, longs to emerge through us, for the world?
What needs to emerge in me, for the sake of the world, for the sake of Thou?

We moved away from language again, took paper and colors…

L: I remembered the density of the World and its resistance. But these little orange things could break free. In my despair I was asking myself: What do I do with this world? Then this very big Woman appeared in my drawing, very dense herself… The World was in me. That gave hope! A very solid a woman can hold the world! She was equal to the task.
If this is the answer to my question… it heals my sense of separation!
Could this be our practice? of seeing through the eyes of the Divine? The whole world is in this decision…
Living in this paradox: I am the world, and the world is in me; the principle of One connects both if I relinguish myself. Then there is space for the field and what comes through it.
If I am not a body; then what is IT that is being expressed? The energetic is so fluid, quickly to move… this re-identification has implications for the field and for the development of the field.
The asking becomes paramount, it is going to bring a possibility… the cellular structure will be changed and influence others. If I ask to be present to who I really am, then it becomes contagious!
The drawing brought it’s own solution and it is possible that it is true: that we are capable of holding the whole universe. We are it, and it is US!
The fullness of awareness is not dependent on time or process. The experience of it brings it about.

S: My gift is around movement and beauty. The world is doing what it is doing, and I am the tree: expressing, laughing, screaming. The world loves this beauty, this manifestation. It just helps, it supports, it is not a specific solution. Everything is on the tree: love, music, conversations, tragedy, movies, friendship; presence, marriage, beaches, tears… The density, something solid is needed to hold the world.

M: Since I was a little girl I had heard the world weep and I didn’t know how to hold her. How to be in the presence of a weeping world that doesn’t overwhelm me, doesn’t consume me? My whole life was about understanding that.

I recognise that it takes conversations and a big heart. What radiates out is something that I cannot not. It has made me a little weird… but it gave me the ability to see; things unfold for me. That is why I am good at organisational development and coaching… but it is also a burden.

Now I see the bridge, the concept of collective presencing. There are the hearts and the symbols of infinity… the brown lines are the mycellium. When I leave the space, there are others holding it. The We, and what is created through the We is my path. With the We I can fall asleep at night. It is a field of presence that is being held.
The mycellium gave me a way… it gives nutrients, and the leaves falling feed the mycellium. If we don’t understand this, the crying of the world is left.
Organisations pup up as mushrooms, live, and die when needed, giving their nutrients. This is totally different than reorganisation, aquisition etc.
This helps me to see death, and my death, differently.

J: I wanted to tap into Source and my question is: How I move with that into the manifest world? This is the challenge of my life.
I was drawing many wombs, coming up like in the U process. There is continually evolving, do it over and over, and begin to interact with the manifest. It can come into structure now. It is about continually accessing Source. It is a continually birthing process.
M: The world is working with us, it doesn’t have any struggle! The world gives us words like mycellium, it is trying to find us! When something is spoken that makes sense, it starts to blossom; without having to move it uphill.
L: They become attractors in a chaos field. In an emergence they form around a next level of develop.
S: I had a welcome feeling of the space, and the arc, the fluidity, the gentleness of the surface… I want to dive in that space that you created. It maps about ‘holding space’. I can go in and do so much. The longing itself is a spiritual practice; it is the part of the heart. The longing generates creativity! The longing creates space.

R: First came this yellow and then the colors on one side, and next the colors on the other side. Then I put it aside. I had to take it back to add the red dot.
L: The emergent at the very end happened out of the combination of all colors. It doesn’t look like anything else. It takes all my attention.
M: It looks like something is planted.
S: For me the red dot is R herself. I see all colors from Spirit and Source and R steps up in the manifest world. It is time for the woman underneath to step up, just at the edge…

It felt complete.
Our circle was closing. We cleaned up the room and went to lunch.
One last group picture and we left.
Our time was rich, good, fertile, promising for the future.

After sensing into the first part of M’s map the I of the leader we shifted our attention to the We part of it. This wasn’t as clear as the first part, so this posting might be a little of ‘bits and pieces’… we will see.

I remember speaking vividly about the difference of feminine knowing and masculine knowing. It was more a showing than a speaking actually! Masculine knowing is taking a step back (see me stepping away) from the experience, it is talking about something, it is building a concept after the facts… Feminine knowing (not to be confused with women’s knowing! men know this too!) is knowing IN the experience (see me stepping into the center again). While drawing ‘getting something’ you never understood before; while walking in nature ‘getting’ what you need to do next. The knowing IS in the totality of your being, not just in your head; it is as if your cells understood something.

We spoke about what Collective Presencing really meant. It can only happen in a combination of together holding a question, being in collective inquiry with a collective holding space, a connection to source or soul. As women we are wired through our wombs – to bring the Source back into the world. In doing so we, as women, become more whole, but men become more whole too. We are in this way healing across gender.

I remember taking M. in the middle of our circle, taking her in a collective hug, where she could ‘get’ – in a feminine, experiencing way – that she was welcome in this We. The We is not a headplace, the We can only be experienced. This brought up the entanglement of ‘being intimate in a physical way’ with ’sexuality’. It is important to make the difference between them. Another entanglement showed up in a constellation that emerged out of the question: What would my womb tell me? How do I/we move from the womb? It was an entanglement between womb and sexuality, which blurred right relationship with men. There was confusion – held by so many women – : To be a powerful woman, I can’t be sexual, I can’t be attractive to men. In the constellation the woman could take her womb and her sexuality next to her, which made her feel powerful and complete. This is my home. Bringing in the element of the World gave her a larger perspective, much broader than the relationship with the man only. It was inspiring for the man too! The relationship with your purpose, freed all my creative energy! The constellation was complete.

The constellation also showed that we, as women, have to step forward with what we know is right to do. We can stop complaining that men don’t do it in the right way; but step forward and say: I/we know something here; at least the next step. Are you willing to come along?

We started our Sunday morning, after breakfast and after meditation done by some of us, with a walk. Up and down the road, as the tracks in the forest were way too wet. It amased me throughout the whole day how easily things would flow, how naturally we made transitions from one way of being together to another way. Like M. and I walking down this road, and at a certain moment, not talking about it, not agreeing about it, we just turned and walked back. This is a quality of alignment that is really dear to my heart. As someone said later, Kairos and Chronos come together.

There was wonderment in the circle that you can really be pulled forward by emergence. I explained that synchronicity or being aware of the intangible is not emergence. Emergence is a scientific term; it describes that when a new kind of relationship between different ‘wholes’ comes into being, it creates a really new kind of whole that has never exited before. This made us dive deeper into what this Collective Presencing is about. As individuals we all need to be whole, centered, aligned in ourselves. This means to me an alignment, a resonance between our head, our heart and with an open will. When we gather in a circle then � with a shared question or intention � we form a container for Source or Soul to come through. We realised that the five of us gathered here and now, is a unique possibility, this is a unique field that we create, that will never ever happen again!

At a certain moment we all shared what was present. It was crucial for S. to feel calm again, to hear from each of us. It gave us all a sense of where we were in relation to our shared field. L. realised that this way of being is not about trying to understand what is going on, but a commitment to be present with each other. If we do that the field re-opens again.

Being present is like a gift, �your presence makes me feel good�. And it makes the field tangible. What is then the shared inquiry that we are all present with?

This was written down:
What
wants to,
needs to,
longs to
Emerge
now
through us?