On food and eating
When is the food really to nurture myself, to make me able to participate in life fully?
When is eating a habit? “You have to eat for the hunger that will come.” Used to say my parents sometimes.
When is eating a way out of emotional discomfort?
All these questions have been with me these days. It is springtime and that is the normal time for some inner cleaning or fasting.
I have also, many times, realized that eating too much – resulting in overweight of course – is a sign of greed, or at least not being in balance. Why should we eat more than we need? I don’t see most animals or plants do that.
When I eat of emotional discomfort, like yesterday, I wake up at night and my stomach tells me I am/was not in balance. While awake, I took the decision to really sense deep into this pattern. Lying in bed I was totally relaxed but my stomach was not! It felt as if it was somehow hanging in the air and not resting on the mattress. As if it was – fearfully – trying to hold some stability. Which – of course – it was not.
Sensing deeper I realized that yesterday some uncertainty had come up around the piece that I am writing. This resulted in inappropriate eating. My sensing went on… what if I had relaxed in the uncertainty? Then it would have become just a not-knowing. No big deal! I just had to wait a few hours and connection with some friends and there came the answer!
What is living life fully?
Taking the food that is nurturing me, or eating unconsciously?